Without Jesus, I am nothing…

I really really really dont like people comment about me… GOOD nor BAD!!! Who are u to comment me? Who are u to disturd my life? Who are u to label me without giving me a chance to defend myself?

Ok, i cant control wat people going to comment me. I cant figured out who is the one has commented me. I cant blame that people who want to comment me without giving me a chance to defend myself.

So, i will say, I DONT CARE! Watever u want to comment, watever u want blame, watever u wan to label, watever u want to…….!!! Ya, u r right! I am angry now. Very very very angry. But i want to ignore the comment started by now! Very tired to take all the comments.

Talk la… u all can talk when ever u want, wat ever u want and who ever u want. i am tired. I will learn to be a mute and deaf… by the way, this is my rubbish bin. dont respect u will read some beautiful message here. Do not have to click in when u saw a post under ‘RUBBISH BIN’!

如果有那么一个人，他从你中五开始就告诉你他爱你。你的生日从不落空，即使知道你有别人了还是在等你。一直到你今年已经23岁了，他还是像朋友- - 比朋友还要好的那样对待你……你会接受他吗？6 年后的今天，如果现在的你是单身的，你会吗？当然，你对他的感觉是多于一个朋友的……

只是，他与你之间有一个价值观达不到共识……六年前如此，现在亦然……那价值观就是你的人生观……你绝对不会舍弃的……该怎么办？

我知道，到最后，答案会是NO! 因为，价值观就是一个人的想法，行动与情绪的动机点 （y teng, 2009). 一个人，如果，为了另一个人而放弃自己的价值观， 那么，他存在的价值又会在哪里呢？他也是那么想的吧……所以，他也不会为了一个人而牺牲自己的价值观！也因为这样，六年以来，都是这样……

哈哈，说了好像没说酱……所以，哈哈，真的是一封没有意义的post……

I can sense he is angry with me. I do not know the reason… He can reply other people’ message but not mine. What have i did that made him ‘MAD’ on me? I have no idea.

At least YOU tells a! If you say nothing, i will never know and have no chance to improve. What should I do and what you wants me to do?

I am not sure that you will come and visit my blog… A niu, tell me la. What happened? I am scared

Self-Directed Search is my favourite career inventory… Holland was the founder. This theory proposes that interest will construct the personality of an individual. The interaction of an individual with the best fit environment promote better chance for him to be success and getting more satisfaction.  

My final year project is focuses on this area. Placement of an individual and the outcome. My research participants are students. In the beginning, i am still blur about the procedure to develop the major code for my participants. The time my brother asked me about the code, i am thinking of a logic but invalid process to compute it. After i met Prof Madya Sidek, He said ‘there is a developed procedure!’ I looked here, there, library, resource room, online… oh, o…. cant found!

Until last week, i found a journal ‘Four methods to determine RIASEC codes for college majors and a comparison of hit rates’ by Harrington & Feller (1993). This journal i tracked from the reference list from book. It’s worked! Thanks God. The moral of this story, check the reference list for anything resources that u might left out.

There is very easy… give 3 scores to the highest code, 2 scores to the second and 1 score  to the 3rd highest score. Finally, sum up the scores. The code is formed. ^_^ There are some ethical guideline as well… have to follow or otherwise, it is invalid.

If you are interested to know more about SDS, can contact me and we can share about this interesting inventory… Seems easy, but it is a very technical tool that can help u to make career decision. ^_^

I enjoy being loved by someone… The older I am, the harder for me to respond the love… Do I love someone? Ya, i were… now, Love seems too heary for me… Those know me well can detect my laziness and flighting skills… I dont like to fight therefore i choose to flight… Sound stupid and wasting time… Sound like this guy shouldn’t be me…

The feeling of scare is with me all the time… If i say i dont care about the past, it is definitely lying… If i care about the past, i cant proceed to the future… Well, reach this stage ald… My rational thought comes in… “Is my choice to be in this situation… Stuck or move on… Is my own decision… i have the power to decide my way…”… Ya, Correct! U are the one should pay for ur past… u r the one should allow urself to move on… opps, is ME, not u… Haha…

Anyway, Love is so abstract… just tell me, if one day, u found my love lost…

In my favourite book entitled ‘if you really want to beat stress’, the authors asked ‘ why you want to be a copy since you are an original?’ Yes, it is true! Everyone is so unique and is the only mastercopy in this world. However, some people want to imitate other people until they lost themselves… How pity…..

I am so happy because I am who I am… When i were young, my eldest sister was my model… I like to imitate her in my life… studying, eating habit, attire, the way speaking, school activities and social activities… Could you imagine a 12 years old little girl (not the size but the mental age) follows her 17 years old sisters went out to Yam char with her same age frens? ^_^ Is a funny scene… a little girl in the big group of 17 year-old sisters and brothers  in school… Haha…

When i grew up, i found myself were lost…. I am not sure whether you can imagine the feeling of losting oneself or not… Erm, the feeling is like ‘ who am I?’ ; ‘am i the I?’ ; ‘Where were the I gone?’… no place to seek for, no place to ask for…. Lost… I am not going to use the example likes ‘lost in jungle’ or ‘lost in the middle of the sea’ because i never experienced those. Frankly, it was scary and i could not find a space for Myself… Where am I?

In my age of 14, i start to ‘find’ myself… sound crazy… right? Hahaha… yes, It was crazy… I have tried my best to perform in academic; i have tried my best to identify my favourite and dislike things; I have tried to walk out from the shadow of my eldest sister…. You all might dont know, she is so clever for me… The way she mix around with frens and her style was so charming… Anyway, now I have my own way… Haha…

It was a tough time for me to walk away from the shadow of my eldest sister… I learned, tried, find myself for a very long time… Now, i will say, I am happy because I am who I am… I have my own point of view that might be different with my eldest sister; I have my own style tat definitely unique;  and I am no more a person who similar to her shadow… i am not her copy… Release…… and relief….. from the feeling of lost and frustration…

so, take times to think about it…. ‘ why you want to be a copy since you are an original?‘ Valuing urself and appreciating wat u have in u; both external and internal assets… Be proud of yourself doesn’t mean u r narcissism (self-love)… Be proud of urself for your own quality and be happy for you are who you are… 请支持正版[please support the original]…. ^.^